Episode 69: The Secret Origin of Me


Last week, I made a rant about how local censorship keeps on targeting television and movies and how much I’m against it. I do want to watch them unedited so I can see the vision of the artists who created them in their full glory. While writing that post, that got me thinking about how much I’ve changed over the years…

First, I guess a little background is in order.

I’m a very introverted girl by heart and I’ve always been very shy. I’m this way because my parents were strict while I was growing up. Oh, I’m not complaining! I think I had a very good childhood. My parents were (and still are) very loving; I pretty much got whatever I wanted without having to beg and plead with them.

The tradeoff was I got so attached to my parents and, by extension, my family, that I never really made any close friends while growing up… which was okay since I wasn’t allowed to stay out. In fact, the only parties I can remember going to during my childhood were my relatives birthdays and family reunions. I was pretty bored during those occasions since I didn’t have any cousins my age so I really couldn’t talk to anyone about the stuff I was interested in.

That's pretty much me on the bottom right corner during "parties."

That’s pretty much me on the bottom right corner during “parties.”

I guess that all changed when I started going to high school. I moved from an all girls school to a co-ed school and this was the first time I was exposed to boys. I didn’t really know how to interact with them since I lived such a sheltered life. Thankfully, I met a group of new girls and we bonded over the typical girl stuff. You know… boys and stuff.

Even though we had a lot of common interests, my new friends were different from the girls I was friends with during my grade school days. Maybe because they were used to talking to boys and I was kind of fascinated at how easy they did so. But slowly but surely, I started talking to the opposite sex without blushing so much and I managed to come out of my shell.

I said "shell" not "clam"

I said “shell” not “clam”

I guess since this time also coincided with puberty, it just so happened that I started to create my own identity and start questioning some of the strictness of my parents’ rules. I wasn’t much of a rebel in the sense I would throw a tantrum or tell them they were the worst parents in the world; I’m not that mellow dramatic! I would challenge their authority at times by putting on make-up after school, attending parties after saying “I was just dragged into it!” and other stuff like that.

Thankfully, my parents were cool with all of my antics while growing up. I wasn’t scolded harshly. We just had talks and I reassured them they could trust me since, well, I was growing up! They needed to start letting me do my own things and make some mistakes. Well, I didn’t really say anything that smart or wisdom-y. It was my brother that chimed in and I’m glad he was in my corner during these talks.

Anyway, this was the time I also decided to do my own thing and become a gamer girl since I was extremely interested in it… but I don’t really have to go into that since I already wrote all about that time (see Episode 62, 63 and 64 if you’re interested). I resolved to try the other things my friends were interested in… like anime, cosplay, conspiracy theories (yes, I had a friend that loved reading these sort of things) and much more. Some of these activities (like anime) I assimilated as I found out I enjoyed them and some I discarded (I tried cosplay but my inner introvert kicked in when a lot of people were taking my picture). And all of this made me the girl I am today.

Oh, speaking of gamer girls, boy, do I have a bone to pick with the “normal” gaming community regarding this. And I’ll elaborate further next week!

What about you? What’s your “origin” story? Let me know what it is in the comments section below!


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