Before I go to the article proper, I have to give the SPOILER ALERT right here at the top of the page. Spoilers for the film has been a hot button topic right now so, to avoid any angry fans, I’m putting up the SPOILER WARNING early.

I kind of had to do the SPOILER WARNING early because there is so much to talk about Avengers: Endgame that I still can’t wrap my head around. Can anyone really explain all the time travel stuff? If you can’t change the past since “your past becomes your future,” does that mean Loki is still alive in our current time with a version of the Tesseract since he escaped during the new events of the first Avengers film? Did “Old” Captain America do a whole bunch of stuff but it didn’t matter because he couldn’t change the past anyway since it was his present but it was actually his past from his “young” self and…

Okay, let’s settle down. All the time travel questions boils down to one answer: Because it’s a movie. Actually, this can be the same answer to the following five rather inconsequential questions I have about Avengers: Endgame!

How can Professor Hulk hold an Infinity Stone with his bare hand?

Near the end of the first Guardians of the Galaxy, Star Lord distracts Ronan the Accuser long enough for Rocket to construct a makeshift gun. Drax uses the gun to destroy the hammer Ronan was using to house the Infinity Stone and Peter Quill grabs it and is nearly ripped apart by its power. I bet you all remember that scene because it was awesome.

This isn’t the only instance where it’s shown that wielding an Infinity Stone can have disastrous outcomes. Red Skull was wiped out by the Space Stone when the Tesseract, which was housing the Infinity Stone got cracked. You see the characters go to great lengths to avoid touching the stone. Even Doctor Strange and the Ancient One had to use their magic to avoid holding the Time Stone in between their fingers. They’ve been hinting throughout the films that touching an Infinity Stone can be disastrous to your health.

So how come Professor Hulk can just hold onto the Time Stone, a freaking Infinity Stone with no problem?

The only other being to be able to handle the Infinity Stones with his bare hands has been Thanos and that’s easily explained as he has the Infinity Gauntlet and The Mad Titan already has a couple of Infinity Stones in his possession before he actually touched one. He could use the power of the other Stones to shield him from any harm.

But Professor Hulk didn’t have any kind of protection. Yet, when the Ancient One handed him the Time Stone, nothing happened to him. I didn’t see him put it in a fancy case or anything like that, did you? He may be a Hulk but he should’ve felt at least some pain, right?

Oh, since I mentioned Thanos…

Did Thanos’ revised plan make any sense?

Thanks to Nebula travelling back to 2014, Thanos figures out that he succeeds but there are people, namely The Avengers, trying to undo The Decimation. After he travels to his future and our present… which is also technically our future since the film is set in 2023 but it’s the film’s present time…

Anyway, Thanos figures out that simply dusting half the life of the universe just won’t do because there will always be people like The Avengers to try to reverse his work. He then tells Captain America, Iron Man and Thor that he now plans to reduce the universe and rebuild it from scratch.

But does that plan really make sense?

Think about it: if Thanos does do this, wouldn’t the universe’s population eventually get to the point where they would be fighting for resources, which is what Thanos wanted to stop by wiping out half the universe? It might not happen immediately but you know it’ll happen eventually. Then he’ll then have to keep on using the Infinity Stones periodically to cull the universe’s population and that’s even while considering that he survives each and every atom of the universe being stripped down!

While we’re talking about using the Infinity Stones, let’s talk about one Stone in particular and the entire process of how to get it…

Shouldn’t Black Widow come back to life when Captain America returned the Soul Stone?

One of the most heartbreaking scenes in Avengers: Endgame is Black Widow’s sacrifice to obtain the Soul Stone. Both she and Hawkeye knew that one of them had to die in order for the other to obtain the Stone. I do think it was really convenient storytelling that both Black Widow and Hawkeye, the two heroes that have close ties to each other was sent on this mission. Imagine what would’ve happened it if was Nebula and War Machine who got this gig! Even after Natasha threw herself over the cliff, I personally thought they were going to bring Black Widow back since Marvel is planning to give her a solo movie in Phase 4. Too bad they spoiled the entire thing in the trailer, though.

Anyway, at the end of Avengers: Endgame, Captain America is sent on a time travelling quest again to return all the Infinity Stones back to their original time periods so that the timeline doesn’t splinter… but wouldn’t there be two Space Stones now since Loki stole the Tesseract during the new events of the first Avengers… stopstopstop. I really have to stop thinking of all that. Back to the topic at hand…

I assume that Captain America succeeds with his mission as he decides to retire in the past with Peggy Carter and live the normal life he wanted with the woman he loves. But, if you really think about it, shouldn’t returning the Soul Stone bring Black Widow back to life?

Remember that the only way to get the Soul Stone is to sacrifice something you love. More specifically, this Infinity Stone demands “a soul for a soul.” The Red Skull Keeper Thing says as much during both Infinity War and Endgame.

By this argument, shouldn’t you get back whatever “soul” you sacrificed if you do return the Soul Stone? I mean, “a soul for a soul” is pretty clear. Also, The Red Skull Keeper Thing mentions that the Soul Stone has a kind of “wisdom” to it. Shouldn’t it also agree to something like reviving whatever was used to get it?

Speaking of convenient storytelling…

Are you seriously telling me that a rat saved everyone who was affected by The Decimation?

If you walked out of the cinema before the after credit scene of Ant-Man and the Wasp, you’re probably kicking yourself now because you have no idea how important that scene was for Avengers: Endgame.

The after credit scene in question had Ant-Man entering the Quantum Realm to get more quantum energy to help Ghost… who wasn’t in that final “girl power” scene of Avengers: Endgame… how strange. Anyway, Scott uses the quantum tunnel affixed into a junky van with the plan that he’s pulled out after some time by Wasp and her scientist/genius parents, Hank Pym and Janet Van Dyne. Unfortunately, before they can pull him out, Thanos snaps his fingers off screen and The Decimation happens, resulting in the trio being dusted.

Ant-Man eventually escapes from the Quantum Realm through the quantum tunnel in the van. How, you may ask? Well, a rat jumped onto a lever in the van, which activates the quantum tunnel and Scott Lang realizes that, although only five hours have passed for him, everyone else experienced five years elapsing.

But let’s get back to the rat: did the Marvel Cinematic Universe just tell audiences that the unsung hero, the thing that initiated The Avengers’ renewed fervor to revive everyone who got dusted by The Decimation, is a rat?

No, really. A rat indirectly saved all those people from The Decimation. That’s what I got when I saw this scene! They could’ve made it Scott Lang’s kid, who could’ve been trying to repair the van and accidentally activate the quantum tunnel. Or Ant-Man’s doofus friends who clean the van and just nudge the lever. Or even the giant ant that was left in Ant-Man’s house!

You’re really going with an unknown rat, Marvel? Okay…

Speaking of creatures that magically appeared in the Marvel Cinematic Universe…

Where did Valkyrie get her winged horse?

Thor: Ragnarok was a breath of fresh air for the God of Thunder’s films. His first two movies were rather serious so when Rangarok injected a whole lot of levity to his trilogy, this revitalized the character from brooding hero to a goofball. This was also the film that introduced Valkyrie, an Asgardian in self-imposed exile after her entire group was killed by Hela.

You can clearly see her flying a winged horse in the flashback. However, you never see the creature ever again in the movie. You never see them bring aboard a winged horse in the giant ship at the end of Thor: Ragnarok. You also don’t see it when Hulk and Rocket make a trip to New Asgard to recruit Thor in Avengers: Endgame.

So, where does Valkyrie get her new flying horse?

You know what’s funny? Among all of the inconsequential questions I’ve posted for this article so far, this is the one that bothered me the most. I don’t know why but it really does! I can accept time travel loopholes because of movie logic, saving the universe via lucky rat and movies breaking their own rules. But seeing a flying horse without rhyme or reason just broke me for some reason!

BONUS: Am I going to have to suffer five more years of The Dab being a thing?

I’m not the best person to ask when it comes to the topic of what’s cool. But I know what I find annoying. You know what I find annoying? The Dab. Not because it’s a thing… but because it’s still a thing!

So when I saw Professor Hulk do a Dab, I cringed. Not because Professor Hulk did it but because Avengers: Endgame is saying that the Dab will still be a thing five years from now! Please, for the love of God, no!

Have you come up with any inconsequential questions after watching Avengers: Endgame? Let me know what they are in the comments below!