Burger Month: Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded Burger

I really love doing Burger Month. I know it isn’t all that popular to enjoy eating burgers as it’s supposedly unhealthy and all that. Also, burgers are kind of frowned upon here in the Philippines as this is generally a country that loves its rice. But I really do love eating burgers as it’s one of those things you can eat in a hurry when you’re hungry without the need for utensils. It’s a complete meal as you got your protein, carbs and fat all in one handy sandwich. You also get a lot of variety with burgers and no two burgers are never exactly alike. But the best thing about burgers is that, when properly made, they are incredibly filling. Why am I saying this? Because “filling” is probably one of the most apt descriptions for Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded Burger. It’s definitely the most deceptively filling one I’ve ever had. I’ll tell you why a little later.

I have eaten at Tender Bob’s before but I usually go there for the steaks (another type of food I thoroughly enjoy binging on if I have the cash to get a good steak). But, as this is Burger Month, I went back there to try the burgers. I looked through their menu and I decided to go get the the most expensive thing on the menu, which is the Fully Loaded burger. Looking at the description, however, I didn’t get what supposedly made the burger “fully loaded.” The menu simply describes it as a burger with bacon, sauteed mushrooms and cheddar cheese.

Seems like the tamest “fully loaded” burger, right?

Anyway, I ordered the Fully Loaded burger even though it seemed rather light. I wanted to get it with “potato hay,” which I’m assuming is just deep fried potato strings. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any at the time; they only had onion rings and french fries available. For the life of me, I really couldn’t really think of a good reason why they wouldn’t have “potato hay” ready since, if my assumption is correct, it’s just shredded potato. Whatever the reason, I got my Fully Loaded burger with french fries as I wasn’t in the mood for something as greasy as onion rings at the time. I was hungry but I didn’t want the oily feeling then.

After a few minutes, I got my Fully Loaded burger and, well, I finally understood why Tender Bob’s gave it the monicker. I wasn’t expecting a dinky little burger because, hey, I’m spending a lot of cash for it, but I certainly didn’t expect it being so huge! Yes, the Fully Loaded burger does come with bacon, mushrooms and cheese… but it came with so much more. Apparently, Tended Bob’s failed to mention that it also included two beef patties, a mound of grilled onions, a healthy amount of shredded lettuce and a couple of tomatoes! Suffice to say, I got much more than I expected! The fries looked puny compared to the Fully Loaded burger!

Fully loaded is right! Why didn’t they mention the other stuff in the menu?

Because I wasn’t expecting the Fully Loaded to have its considerable heft, I will say it looked really good! Thank God I was hungry then and I have the body type that doesn’t need to go on a diet because you can just tell by looking at the burger that it was up there when it comes to calories. While it looked like a starving man’s dream, I do have to comment that the burger looked like it was going to fall apart if the little toothpick on the top didn’t hold things together. Getting a handle on it was kind of difficult. When I grabbed it, I could feel things trying to slide apart almost immediately. I couldn’t even wrap my mouth around it because it was so thick (that’s what she said?).

As it was kind of hard to get the entire thing in my mouth in one bite, I had to eat the Fully Loaded burger in layers initially. I will say that eating a burger this way was kind of disheartening because it didn’t feel like I was eating it in the correct way. However, this manner of eating it did give me the opportunity to really examine how each individual component tasted by themselves instead of how they complimented each other and I do have to say I liked how most of how each respective ingredient tasted. The burger patties, which I had ordered to be cook to medium doneness were still juicy and flavorful. The lettuce, while not exactly fresh, still retained a crispness to them. The tomato fared much better as there was certainly still some bite to it while remaining soft. The bacon was cooked extremely well since they were really crispy but still soft enough to bite through without any problems. The bun tasted rather plain but I was impressed that it retained its basic integrity despite barely keeping all of the ingredients contained while absorbing some of the beef patties’ juices.

Yikes! That’s bigger than I expected! (That’s what she said?)

Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded burger isn’t perfect, however. The menu description said that it’s supposed to have mushrooms in the burger but, for the life of me, I couldn’t really find any. I’m assuming the mushrooms are there but I didn’t want to go rooting in the burger as I was afraid it would fall apart if I took it apart. The grilled onions weren’t, well, they weren’t grilled enough as the while onions had a rather strong and overpowering flavor to them. My suspicions that the onions were a little too strong were confirmed when, around getting halfway through eating the Fully Loaded burger, I began to eat it as a whole instead of in pieces. Sure enough, there was definitely a strong onion aftertaste with each and every bite. Its’ nothing bad, mind you, but it is kind of distracting since everything else compliments each other nicely.

Since I did get a side of french fries with the Fully Loaded burger, I guess I have to talk about them as well even if I don’t want to. Honestly, they weren’t anything special. I say they’re a notch below “good,” in fact. There wasn’t anything bad about Tender Bob’s fries, i.e. they weren’t disgusting or anything like that. Rather, they were rather bland as I needed to add a copious amount of salt to them. I normally can enjoy french fries without any ketchup but, in this case, the ketchup was needed. Also, each fries’ texture was inconsistent, with some of them having a good crunchy crust to them while some other bits were limp, soggy strands.

The reason why potato fries weren’t available?

Despite the fries being disappointing and the onion being a bit overpowering, I will say Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded burger was really good! I do have to say that I was incredibly hungry so getting the surprisingly double sized burger may have been a factor in my enjoyment. The mere fact that I felt satisfied after eating the Fully Loaded burger even when super starving must mean that it was big enough to satiate my tummy. With that being said, I don’t think I can recommend the Fully Loaded burger if you just want a snack. However, if you’re feeling famished and you have the money, I say give Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded a whirl.

Have you tried Tender Bob’s Fully Loaded burger? What did you think of it? Let me know in the comments section below!


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