I’ll Review Anything: WWE Fastlane (2015)

Hiya!

In a month’s time, WWE’s biggest pay-per-view event will be shown. Wrestlemania is the mecca of all wrestling events with Superstars of the ring show their best. It’s supposed to be the most exciting time for a wrestling fan. But, after WWE Fastlane, I’m kind of dreading what we’re going to get in March.

WWE Fastlane was supposed to be a pivotal pay-per-view as the winner of the Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns will determine the main event for Wrestlemania. So, being the huge (well, I’m not huge in the literal sense; I’m rather petite, really) wrestling fan that I am, I needed to see what to expect next month… and root for Daniel Bryan winning. Sorry, but after the SHIELD broke up, I just can’t see the appeal of Roman Reigns.

You're going to shove what up me?

You’re going to shove what up me?

Anyway, onto the recap and the review of the individual matches!

Match 1: Erick Rowan, Ryback and Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins, Big Show and Kane

Uh, why do we have this match again?

Or, the filler match

Also know as “the filler match”

No, really, why do we have this match? There is no reason for Ryback, Erick Rowan and Dolph Ziggler to have a match against Seth Rollins, Big Show and Kane! Okay, they do have history against each other dating all the way back to Survivor Series. But bunching them all together in this one match that has no consequence at all is a waste of talent! Anyway, the match was pretty boring with a really boring end with Kane getting the pinfall on Dolph.

Oh, it was great to see Randy Orton return and clean house after the match. So at least I’ll have something to look forward to in Raw, right? Right?

Match 2: Goldust vs. Stardust

For the next match, we have the obligatory “tag team blowup” fight.

Crazy vs. Psycho

Crazy vs. Psycho

I’ve been a fan of Cody Rhodes ever since he became “Dashing” Cody Rhodes. I love a good cheesy gimmick and, boy, has Cody run a gamut of those! But his latest gimmick as the totally hyper Stardust takes the cake! It’s a fun and easy character that I hope he’ll use it for a decent amount of time.

However, his match with his own brother, Goldust, just didn’t cut it. There were no good spots and nothing that really showcased the wrestling talents of Gold and/or Star Dust. The worst part was the come out of nowhere rollup by Goldust. Here’s hoping the two are saving up something special for Wrestlemania because their match at Fastlane simply didn’t cut it.

Match 3: The Usos vs. Cesaro and Tyson Kidd for the WWE Tag Team Championship

By this time, I was really bored. So I’m glad this match was actually pretty good!

Brothers vs. brothers from another mother?

Brothers vs. brothers from another mother?

I’m generally fine with the Usos but what I don’t like about them is they have no personality as individuals. However, I will concede that they are a very good tag team and wrestle really well together. The team of Cesaro and Kidd on the other hand, seemed like a team WWE decided to mesh together because they couldn’t figure out what to do with them. But still, I love Cesaro and I really hoped he would get a decent push…which he kind of did since he and Tyson Kidd are the new WWE Tag Team Champions!

The mach did take a while to heat up but, by the end, things were going at a really brisk pace. It was a great match overall. If Cesaro and Tyson Kidd to stay as a team, I’m hoping they create a finisher that utilizes both their skills like the Legion of Doom’s Doomsday Device. They’ll need it to stay champs!

Interview Segment 1: Triple H challenges Sting

Am I the only one that actually likes the idea of this match?

Sledgehammer vs Bat

Sledgehammer vs Bat

I know more people are hoping to see Sting take on The Undertaker but I’m not one of them. I’ll talk more about that later. But I’m here to review this segment. And it’s was… meh. I guess that’s the problem when you have a guy in a promo that doesn’t talk that much!

Match 4: Paige vs Nikki Bella for the Divas Championship

My favorite segment: The Divas division!

I really hate Nikki Bella

I really hate Nikki Bella

I may be in the minority but I really love the Divas division because… it’s women doing things that you wouldn’t think women should be doing. But that’s just me.

The match between Paige and the reigning Nikki Bella was above average. Nothing spectacular but I can’t fault Paige for that. She pulled off a lot of good spots and she tried her darnedest to get the crowd into it. It may be a personal bias (see my comment above regarding Nikki) but I blame my poor reception towards this match solely on Nikki. She just didn’t add anything to it.

Match 5: Dean Ambrose vs Bad News Barrett for the Intercontinental Title

I love these two guys! Who should I root for?

Bad News vs Worse News?

Bad News vs Worse News?

This was a match that definitely had lots of potential. These two guys are really good wrestlers. I actually liked this match as it highlighted their personalities as well as their signature moves. Barrett even did the classic bad guy move by walking out of the match with the title! Too bad the finish was lousy with Ambrose getting disqualified for continuing to pummel Barrett.

Maybe they’ll fight again with No Disqualification rules in Wrestlemania?

Interview Segment 2: Bray Wyatt challenges the Undertaker

Two spots without wrestling? What is this? A “special edition” of Monday Night Raw?

Nice swerve!

Nice swerve!

When the druids came out with a casket, I was expecting the first appearance of The Undertaker since last year’s Wrestlemania. It turns out it was Bray Wyatt issuing a formal challenge to the Phenom. I did like the entire speech Bray Wyatt did and it was compelling if a little bit predictable; you can only go to crazytown so often until you get familiar with all the landmarks.

My issue is the match itself. While most people wanted to see Undertaker take on Sting (which won’t happen since the latter is gonna fight Triple H), I want to see The Deadman have a rematch with the man who defeated The Streak. It’s only fitting that The Undertaker has a chance to redeem his one and only failure against the man that broke The Streak.

Match 6: John Cena vs. Rusev for the United States Championship

It’s nice of John Cena to “lower” himself and go for the “lowly” United States Title.

Let's go, Cena! Cena sucks!

Let’s go, Cena! Cena sucks!

Say what you will about Cena but he does know how to deliver a good match. And this was no exception. Everyone looked particularly strong. Rusev even kicked out of Cena’s finisher, The Attitude Adjustment! Although Rusev did have to cheat by connecting with a low blow while Lara distracted the referee, but that is par for the course for a John Cena match. You can’t have him lose cleanly, can you?

Still, really great match and I would actually say it was the best match of the night.

Match 7: Daniel Bryan vs Roman Reigns for the Number 1 contender’s spot

Here we go! This is the match that we’ve been waiting for!

The "corporate" champ vs the "people's" champ

The “corporate” champ vs the “people’s” champ

I do understand the hate surrounding Roman Reigns. He’s the guy the higher ups picked to be the Next Big Thing. The problem is Daniel Bryan is the Next Big Thing. At least in the eyes of millions of WWE fans. Nowadays, fans don’t like to be force fed who to root for and who to boo. Hence, the backlash against the former Shield member.

Me? Just don’t like Roman Reigns because he has a dull wrestling persona and not charismatic in my opinion. He’s actually a lot like John Cena in a way. And we know how fans are divided about him!

Anyway, the match was actually pretty good! All of their traditional spots were all hit and everyone had really good runs dominating each other. I even liked the finish as it was kind of unexpected. I sort of felt the WWE was going to buckle under the pressure of fans and just let Daniel Bryan take the number one contender’s spot from Roman Reigns.

I’m surprised they didn’t but, at the same time, I’m glad. Maybe they have big ideas for Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar for Wrestlemania. While I don’t think that match will become a classic, I do think it’ll be at least watchable. Roman Reigns is a decent wrestler but I do think it’s too soon for the WWE to be giving him the title.

Oh, bold prediction: Roman Reigns wins the title at Wrestlemania… Then Seth Rollins cashes in Money in the Bank to become your NEW WWE Champion!

Conclusion

Overall, WWE Fastlane felt like a decent Monday Night Raw. Too many interview segments and the matches were pretty much hit-or-miss. There were three good matches (Cesaro and Kidd winning the titles, Cena passing out to Rusev’s finisher and the clean win by Roman Reigns) but the rest of the segments and matches were boring. Average.

What did you think of WWE Fastlane? Let me know in the comments section below!

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